Crazy Life

I apologize, to all the members of this blogging world,

For my scarcity in writing and most random disappearance. 

My brain is fried.

My days are filled with stress and bewilderment.

I honestly have not had one minute to sit down and write

the situation of my life.

From homework,

to the end of the term,

to Dance Company,

to getting ready for prom,

to running for SBO,

my life has been a complete whirlwind.

I have not had a minute to myself.

So, my apologies.

I promise I will write more soon.

Til then, adios!

Turn to Him. He will help you.

"Mortality is a period of testing, a time to prove ourselves worthy to return to the presence of our Heavenly Father. 

In order to be tested, we must sometimes face challenges and difficulties. 

At times there appears to be no light at the tunnel's end-no dawn to break the night's darkness. 

We feel surrounded by the pain of broken hearts, 

the disappointment of shattered dreams, 

and the despair of vanished hopes. 

We join in uttering the biblical plea "Is there no balm in Gilead?" 

We are inclined to view our own personal misfortunes through the distorted prism of pessimism. 

We feel abandoned, heartbroken, alone. 

If you find yourself in such a situation, I plead with you to turn to our Heavenly Father in faith. 

He will lift you and guide you. 

He will not always take your afflictions from you, 

but He will comfort and lead you with love through whatever storm you face."

--Thomas S. Monson, "Looking Back and Moving Forward",


I secretly took this from Jillian.
Take a gander at her blog.
You will not be disappointed.
http://jillybeandancer.blogspot.com/

Gratitude. A Simply Thing.

Sometimes in life, you have to learn to be grateful.

Gratitude is primary factor in being happy.

It is being thankful for what has happened, and rejoicing for what is to come.

The only people with whom you should try to get even are

 those who have helped you.  

John E. Southard

If you have lived, take thankfully the past.  

John Dryden

I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought;

 and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.  

G.K. Chesterton

Praise the bridge that carried you over.  

George Colman

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, 

but rejoices for those which he has.  

Epictetus

We can only be said to be alive in those moments 

when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.

Thornton Wilder

If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. 

 It will change your life mightily.

Gerald Good

I am a quote gooroo. Sue me.

Lately, gratitude has been on my mind.

And my lack there of.

I love ah-ha moments.

Today I have come to the conclusion that if I gain a better sense of gratitude,

my life will be changed. 

Forever.

I need to be grateful for my time with Elder.

I need to smile for the kisses and memories we share.

I need to rejoice in the fact that he is sharing the gospel.

He is growing.

I need to be grateful for him.

I need to be grateful for everything he taught me.

Take in those lessons.

And smile.

Because those were the happiest days of my life.

I need to be grateful for this time I have to grow.

To discover new things about myself.

I need to show gratitude to my Savior for bringing Elder into my life.

Instead of crying over the fact that he is gone.

Gratitude. 

I need to be grateful for my time with Wonderboy.

I need to get over the fact that I will never be enough for him.

I need to smile at all our memories,

and be grateful for all our laughs.

I need to be grateful for the assembly.

I need to show gratitude for our little dates.

For the texts.

For the giggles and giddy feelings.

Because Heavenly Father sent Wonderboy for a reason.

I need to show gratitude for the fact that Wonderboy picked me up.

Out of the shadows and cracks of my heart.

And gave me hope.

Even if this never excels into anything more,

I need to be grateful for the role that he has played in my life.

For showing my I can live a happy life without Elder.

For now.

Gratitude.

I need to be grateful for my family.

Show appreciation to my Papa for his hard work and determination.

I need to be grateful for his persistence in change and self growth.

I need express to my mommy my love for her.

And all she does for me.

I need to be grateful for her testimony and all the years I have relied on it.

I need to be grateful for her help in building my own.

I need to grateful for giving me her eyes.

I need to be grateful for her standing by my side, even when I am wrong.

I need to express my love for my siblings.

For little Kylie, and her example to me.

For sweet Brayden, and his vivaciousness for life.

And for my dearest brother Joshua.

I need to show gratitude for his willingness to serve the lord.

Instead of wollowing in my own self pity.

I need to be grateful for his loving heart.

For his transformation into a man.

For his testimony.

For getting my loving brother back.

Gratitude.

I need to be grateful for my friends.

The true ones.

The ones that would die to give me the world. 

I need to be grateful for the friends that would bend over backwards to make me happy.

Instead of crying because of the ones I have lost.

I need to be grateful for all those who care about me.

Who try to make me smile.

Who try to brighten my day.

Gratitude.

I need to be grateful for my life.

I need to be grateful for having the blessing of the gospel.

For the Holy Ghost.

For my Patriartical Blessing.

For Young Womens.

For the scriptures.

For prayer.

I need to stop running through the motions and fully appreciate

the blessings I have been given.

Show gratitude to my big brother, The Savior, and his atonement.

For Him giving his life so I can live with my Heavenly Father again.

Gratitude.

There are so many things to be grateful for.

Express them.

Let loved ones know how much you care about them.

Let your Heavenly Father know how much you care about Him.

When you focus on what you have

instead of what you have lost, or what you could get,

your life will flip a one-eighty.

That is my challenge to you.

Show gratitude.

Smile at everyone.

Love those around you.

Be grateful for the time you have shared.

And look to better yourself.

Be thankful.

You will be happy.

What a Trip.

What a weekend to remember.

Man, on a scale of one to ten how much do I love St. George?

Probably a 100000000.

I love the heat.

I love the desert.

I love the city.

I love everything about it.

I had the opportunity to go down with these fine young ladies:

Miss Tatianna 

Miss Natalia.

Oh man, I absolutely adore these girls.

We left Friday.

It was a glorious trip south.

Filled with laughs and tears.

Stories of heart break and missionaries.

At one point on our journey, I got a little dizzy.

I simply asked Tat to roll down her window to get some fresh air.

Before I could even comprehend what was happening,

I vomited.

All over the car.

Yes, quite embarrassing.

So they had to pull while I cleaned myself up.

Finally, we arrived at our little place.

It was lovely.

A one story house with pink carpet, pink walls, and pink curtains.

The ultimate grandma house.

I fell in love with it.

We woke up the next morning early and ready for some baseball.

After a small adventure of finding the field, we settled down for the day.

And it was HOT.

I mean scorching.

I was soooo pleased.

I was ecstatic to get away from the snow and into the sun.

But let me tell ya.

I got burned.

Really burned.

Tomato red.

It hurts.

But I was secretly excited.

It was living proof that I spent five hours in the sun.

So it made me happy.

Ohhhh the games.

Let me express my awkward little encounters of the baseball games.

As I sat down I saw

Elder's parents,

Big Bear's parents,

and 

Ren's parents.

All the parents of my past lovers.

I sat there, not knowing whether to cry or laugh.

Smile or crawl under a rock.

After debating internally, I just smiled and laughed.

Decided to shrug it off.

Only to see Big Bear sitting on the front row.

That was the first time I saw him after he read my post explaining all my feelings for him.

That made me want to cry.

We made eye contact.

It was weird.

I didn't like it.

So shrugged that off too.

I just focused on the game.

I love baseball.

Something about the heat mixed with those tight pants. 

mmmm.

After the last game, we crashed at the Boyle's grandparent's house.

I started snoring.

They all giggled.

We met up with some old friends.

The Andrus Brothers.

They are so neat.

We went to Larsen's to get some burgers.

The gang at Larsen's.

Then we traveled up to Dixie Rock to see the amazing city.

We could not get a good serious picture.

So we took one of only the girlies.

Take into account the red legs. I said I was burned.

We are so cute.

We thought we were funny.

After that little adventure, we made our way to the St. George temple.

It is beautiful.

One of my favorites.

This is the next morning but just for you to see :)

We got a little excited.

I cannot wait for that day.

We spent the rest of the night talking.

About boys and life.

It was grand.

The next day, we went to church with the old people.

I loved it.

Then we headed home.

A sweet little trip full of sunshine, longs talks, and adventures.

I am refreshed.

I am ready for school.

I am ready to face the next 20 months alone.

I can do it.

I just need summer and I will be happy.

Escape.

Guess what?

Chicken Butt.

Since that is out of the way...

Today is an exciting day.

Yes, it is indeed.

March 11th has been marked on my calendar for twenty days.

This is how it goes:

Ten days to send a letter.

Ten days to get one back.

IT COULD BE COMING ANY DAY.

My letter.

A sweet reply from my dearest Elder.

I can hardly handle the anticipation and excitement.

Bahh. 

The second grand thing on my agenda for the day would be:

St. Geeeeeezzyyy.

Hallelujah.

I am escaping this town for a weekend.

A long weekend.

I need sunlight to clear my head.

I need time to think.

I need a care free weekend with some old pals.

The Boyle sisters.

Oh, and lets not forget Mama Boyle.

Pictures will be updated shortly of this glorious event.

It is going to be epic.

No boys.

No drama.

Just a relaxing weekend with the ladies in 80 degree weather.

Once again,

Hallelujah.

Tell me your weekend endeavors. 

I'm sure they will be equally as epic.

What A Proud Sister I Am.

I think my brother is funny. 

This is a little excerpt on one of his experiences.

I found it humorous.

I have a funny experience that we had with A Born Again Christian. So we went and talked to this guy named Gilbert. We were sitting down on this hill and we got him talking about the Gospel and he said that we are not Christians because we believe in works to be saved. We asked if we could pray and share some scriptures with him. He wouldn't let us pray. He said that he would start the prayer so that we could follow and let "Jesus Christ come into our heart." So he starts praying and wanted us to repeat him and I didn't but Elder Alshengiti did. He said some stuff that Elder Alshengiti repeated that was true doctrine. Then Gilbert said, "through only faith we will be saved". Then Elder Alshengiti repeated saying, "through faith, repentance, baptism by immersion, receiving the Holy Ghost, and enduring to the end we will be saved. Gilbert says, "no no, through faith alone we will be saved". Elder Alshengiti repeated exactly the same thing that he did before. At this point I am trying not to laugh because Gilbert was getting so mad. We explained to him the true doctrine of Jesus Christ and showed it to him in the Bible and he listened but his heart was so hardened he would not get the pass the fact that proving your faith in Jesus Christ is all you need. So we told him we love him and to pray to God for truth. 

Ohhhhh Joshua.

We love him :) 

Here's the latest picture.

What a stud.

Still the gangta I remember.

LOVE YOU BROTHER!

Gosh Dang It.

UGH 

UGH

UGH

Why is the male species so blind to everything?

Why can't they see your secret messages?

Why don't they understand the love that radiates through your eyes?

SOMEONE ANSWER THIS FOR ME.

There is nothing more heart breaking than this.

UGH

UGH

UGH

I finally decide to put myself out there again.

I get over my fear of loving again.

I want to be happy.

I deserve to be happy.

Well.

I guess it is not my time.

Wonderboy.

That is the subject of my wrath.

Tonight, I listened to him sing.

Did I ever mention that? He has the voice of an angel.

He sang my FAVORITE song of all time.

Yep, one of my songs about Elder.

Talk about ripping your emotions apart.

UGH.

I still have a glimmer of hope.

It could happen.

I can't give up yet.

But no matter what, I just want him to be happy.

Even that means, he's not with me.

I can handle it.

My day will come.