Monday, April 2, 2012

Ask Yourself.

Today, I ran away.

I felt like a little girl again.
When my mommy used to get mad at me,
or daddy was angry,
or my brother was teasing me,
I would pack my tiny sparkly purse with candy and my one dollar allowance.
A strong little tot wanting to take on the world.

I wanted to be escape.
I wanted to clear my head.
I wanted to be free.

That's what I did.

That is what I said today.
I could not take one more second of his indecisive mind.
My heart couldn't handle one more second guessed thought.

I ran.

I jumped in my car, put on my shades, and drove.
I didn't know where I was going...
Just that I needed to get away.

So I drove. And drove. And drove.

Drowning out all my problems to some Adele and Peter Bradley Adams.
There is something about the change of scenery, the roar of my hyundai,
and the music blasting, that can truly clear the mind.

I sang my songs until I found a quiet little park in the middle of nowhere.
I sat against a large oak tree with my diet coke and scriptures.
I needed answers.

After diligent studying, I stopped to take it all in.
The squeaking of the swing set, with the children's playful giggles.
The dog barking as he jogged with his owner.
The wind as it softly grazed the green grass.
And the sun, as it slightly roasted my warm cheeks.

Then it hit me.

Linsey, you are being ridiculous.
There is so much beauty and wonder in the world.
Heavenly Father loves you.
He wants the best for you.
Stop pouting, get out there, and make this happen.

And just like that I was fleeing back home.

Sometimes all you have to do in order to find happiness is
remove yourself from the complications.
Go to a place where thinking comes clearly.
Take a deep breath.
And let your Father in heaven take care of you.

PS. This really works :)

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