Happy Birthday My Darling.

So...

My cousins are the best.

But one specific cousin is my best friend.

It was her birthday today.

She is officially a big 19 year old.

YAY.

Go Nana!

Thank you for being the big (little) sister I never had.

Thank you for putting up with my dramatic ways.

Thank you for sharing my odd obsessions.

Thank you for laughing at my dumb jokes.

Thank you for being the most amazing person.

You are so special to me.

I don't know what I would do without you in my life.

I LOVE YOU.

Best friend.

Best cousin.

Best sister.

Forever.

Psssssss

Tomorrow the epic tale of my little retreat shall be revealed on the pages of this blog.

AHHHHHHHHHHH.

I love my council.

Every single one.

Swings and Delightful Things.

Guys. 

I did it.

I swung on the beloved device that I have been dreaming of for months and months.

The Swing.

Epic.

I know.

Not only did I complete a goal I had been aspiring to accomplish, 

I did so with my Crush.

Yes.

Someone pinch me.

Actually don't.

That would hurt.

But I was myself.

And was I awkward?

You betcha!

But only a little bit, so it's okay.

I'm getting better.

Also, I talked to a new friend.

I like her.

She makes me smile.

YOU know who you are. 

Yep,

I feel cool knowing that this young lady is going to read this.

You inspire me.

Thank you for being so wonderful.

And our connecting moments.

That is all.

I love nights like this.

Go hug your mom.

It is her special day.

I Am Getting Stronger.

We've all grown up, and there's no denying that. But it is tough to tell if in that grown up we've simply grown apart.

I'm a first believer in the power of change. But there is one thing I've learned, and that's the hardest part of moving forward is not looking back. Now here I sit so far a way, remembering all our memories, and it's times like these that I miss you most, remembering when we were so close. Sometimes I wish I could just fast-forward through time, just to see if it's worth it all in the end.

I've learned that things change, people change, and it doesn't mean you forget the past or try to cover it up. It simply means you move on and treasure the memories. Letting go doesn't mean giving up, it means accepting that some things weren't meant to be.

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

Change is never easy. You fight to hold on. You fight to let go. And now we’re left here, two separate paths. You’ll take yours and I’ll take mine. We’re left with broken hearts, growing older, and growing apart. And slowly as the days go by, you lose friends you never thought you would. I’ll remember you when I get old and I start getting wrinkles from all the times you made me laugh.

If ever there is a tomorrow when we’re not together, there’s something you must always remember: You arebraver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think but the most important thing is even if we’re apart I will always be with you.

Tonight, the cheer squad was picked.

My dear friends are officially cheerleaders at American Fork High School.

As I looked at the list of girls, my heart sank as I saw their names bluntly sitting there.

Staring me in eyes. 

Mocking me.

Crack.

There goes my heart.

Everything is going to be different.

They say it isn't going to change.

But how can it not?

Things are never going to be the same.

This fine evening I called my girls as a got off work.

No answers. No calls back.

I then decided to go to the theater to see a movie with my dear cousin.

T-sizzle replied back to my call.

All the newly made cheerleaders were having a party of slumber.

She asked if I would like to be in attendance.

This is what I am talking about.

Usually, Friday nights consist of girl dates.

Texas Roadhouse or Cafe Rio,

preceded by a heart felt chick flick in her bed, 

with deep talks on life,

and chocolate.

Now, she is going to be with them.

And I will be the little tag-along.

I really don't want that.

I would rather chew off my left foot.

My new council will be my saving grace.

But that honestly will not begin until next year.

So I must persevere through summer and make the most of it.

I am just in a difficult spot.

I am weak.

I am fragile.

I think back to the night I found out I made SBO.

How empowered and strong I felt.

Nothing could stand in my way.

I was given the most amazing blessing in the world.

Nothing could take me down.

Heavenly Father then commanded:

Linsey, Be Humble.

SMITE.

And the trials began.

Within one week, 

I have lost my missionary and my best friends.

I am struggling with heart ache.

And change.

Most importantly, change.

I have a song that directly relates to my life.

Between Elder and my official cheerleaders.

A Little Bit Stronger

Sara Evans

Woke up late today and I still feel the sting of the pain
But I brushed my teeth anyway
I got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my faceI got a little bit stronger

Riding in the car to work and I'm trying to ignore the hurt
So I turned on the radio, stupid song made me think of you
I listened to it for minute but I changed it
I'm getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger

And I'm done hoping that we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

Doesn't happen overnight but you turn around
And a month's gone by and you realize you haven't cried
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer
I'm busy getting stronger

And I'm done hoping that we can work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking, that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days, I get a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

Trials. Trials. Trials.

There are lessons that must be learn.

Heavenly Father is sending me a message.

I am growing.

I am getting stronger.

I can do this.

Change. Its a good thing.

As I sit here in my bed this fine Sunday afternoon

I can't help thinking of my friends.

How I feel like I have none.

I mean, I know my cousin,

my little Callie,

and T-Slate will always be there for me.

No matter.

These young lassies are my truest friends.

They will never leave me.

But will all complete honesty...

The above set of girls are the only ones I am relatively close with.

What happened?

Why do I feel alone?

Where did all my friends go?

I know for a fact, I shooed a couple off.

Because I have a quote that I live by.

"You are who your friends are."

Truest statement in the world.

That is terrifying.

So as my thoughts try to weave and wiggle through this thought process,

I can actually answer all those questions.

What happened?

Change happened. I changed.

My priorities were rearranged.

I began to put my family before friends.

Missionaries before friends.

And probably the biggest one:

The Gospel before friends.

Yes, I realized my testimony and my personal growth relies on my 

willingness to obey and my attempts to stay on the straight and narrow path.

So I took extra me time.

Which meant less time with the girlies.

Why do I feel alone?

I am a friendly person, but I am now more picky with my friends.

I only want people in my life who thrive in the gospel.

Who push me to be my best and know my savior.

Well, not everyone is like that.

People get lost in worldly things, and they lose track of what is important.

So I would rather lack friends and be alone,

than be brought down.

My times of lonliness will only help me grow

and learn self individualism.

Where did all my friends go?

It's what I like to call pick and choose.

I have chosen to let go of certain friends.

I have kept the ones that have meant the most.

I am ready to meet more people.

Stronger people.

Smarter people.

Loving people.

Good people.

I can't wait.

My new endeavor for a new group of individuals

should be lonely but worthwhile.

In the end, I know I will find true happiness.

I have a good feeling about this.

I can't wait.

Huzzah.

The Best Friend. The Cousin.

Cousins are those childhood playmates who grow up to be forever friends.

Anonymous

God made us cousins, because he knew our moms couldn’t handle us as sisters.

Anonymous

Cousin to cousin we’ll always be,

Special friends from the same family tree.

Anonymous

In my cousin, I find a second self.

Isabel Norton

I find myself blessed in so many ways.

I live in sheltered little Utah with the true Gospel in my life.

I have had education always at my finger tips.

I have the best friends in the entire world.

I have been blessed with a family that is strong in the 

gospel and so loving.

But I believe one of my greatest blessings is the fact

that I am bound eternally to my best friend.

My cousin.

My other sister.

Savannah Jae Slater

This beaut has been in my life from the very beginning.

Since our mothers are sisters, Nana has always been in my life.

Being a year and a half older, it was destined that we would be so close.

Sadly, through out our childhood Miss Savannah lived in Arizona.

I only saw her in the summer and on holidays when one of our families would make the 

commute to the opposite state.

Finally, while Sav was in her Jr. High years they moved back to the mormon state. 

And since then, we have been best friends.

I wish I could present every single laugh, every single memory

we have shared together.

Here are a few:

In 2008, we got to enjoy the city lights and subway adventures of

New York.

Disneyland, 2009.

The happiest place on earth is one of our favorite vacations.

We have got to share the experience of two cruises together. 

Best. Vacations. Ever.

We had the pleasure to meet Mr. Archuleta.

Also attending the American Idol Concert, David Cook Season.

We met the Singles Ward guy as well. Epic.

Our many movie experiences, this one being Tangled.

Harry Potter at Midnight. She is a believer.

Our strongest bond and favorite discussion topic would be our

complete and utter love for The Twilight Saga. 

We have been to every single Midnight showing.

We have spent countless hours discussing our love for Edward Cullen.

We are those teenage girls that everyone makes fun of.

But we are PROUD.

So proud, we created this video to show our dislike for Jacob Black.

This was 2008.

We were obsessed.

No judgements please.

This is our pride and joy.

28,000 views. Woot Woot!

As you can see we have had our share of good times.

Not only the good times, but the BEST times. 

Nana has always been there for me.

ALWAYS.

Through the thick and thin.

We both endured losing our Grandpa and Cousin.

Families are together forever.

The poor girl is stuck with me for all of time and eternity.

Savannah Jae is one of the most incredible people I have ever met.

The perfect quote to describe Miss Slater would be:

"The people who don't know me think I am quiet,

those who do wish I was."

My dear cousin is a bit shy. To those she doesn't know.

If only if only they truly knew that Nana that is my best friend.

She is absolutely crazy.

She knows how to make me laugh harder than anyone else.

She is the most understanding person I know.

She loves unconditionally.

She is a hopeless romantic.

She has never kissed a boy, and she is proud of it.

She has a testimony that could make anyone believe.

She is kind to everyone.

She is a hardworker.

She is a fashion diva.

She a 4'11" ball of energy.

She makes the best chocolate chip waffles.

She is the truest friend anyone could have.

She is strong.

She is my biggest role model. 

The list can go on and on.

I look up to her more than she will ever know. If I could say anything to my dear cousin this would be my sentiments:

Dear Savannah,

Thank you. Thank your for everything. I have never met a more Christlike person in my entire life. You have shown me that life can be amazing while still doing the right things. We have endured a lot together. Between Brady, Grandpa O, and.. Kent? We have always had each other to fall on to. I know I haven't been the greatest friend at times. I lose myself in high school and forget what really matters. Family. Families are forever. Friends are going to come and go, and they have. But one thing has always remained constant. That has been you. We have had our rough times, but in the end we always remain best friends. You are my role model Savannah. The way you live your life is so pure. I try to live my life with the unconditional love and eternal perspective that shines through you everyday. Once again, I would like to say thank you. You have changed my life in so many ways. You will always be my best friend. Love you Nana.

Sincerely,

Linsey Lou <3