The First Crush.

Quick update.

Dear Blog,

I have a crush.

A deep loving crush.

And this isn't a sudden infatuation.

No.

It is deep, it is sincere.

This young man was my very first kiss.

Ever.

Want to hear a story?

One day at school I was having a really bad day.

I was beaten with homework and other factors of my life were pulling me down.

I was angry and upset with everyone that crossed my path.

Except for him.

When I saw him my whole day was flip around.

Warmth was brought into my life, he was my sun.

After our class together it was lunch time.

He walked by my side as we ventured to the lunch room. 

We sat down to eat our lunches and our hands accidentally touched as we were unloading our meals.

Butterflies. Swarms and swarms, filling my little stomach.

I liked him so much. 

Just looking at him made me a giddy little piglet.

We walked outside and sat on the curb. 

We just sat looking at the blue sky watching the formation of clouds.

I slowly turned my attention to my little lover.

He grabbed me by the hand and led me to the wood chips beneath the slide.

As we stood under the twisting mass of plastic,

I stood with my hands on my hips, questioning the situation.

He softly tilted his head, and slowly pressing his lips on mine.

I blushed harder than was physically possible.

I was 6 years old.

My pink dress blew in the wind as I realized my unyeilding love for this dashing young man.

With a lunchbox on one hand and his hand laced with mine,

we skipped back to our simple little lives. 

Oh, young love.

So profound.

So innocent.

Guess what happened from there?

We spent the rest of Kindergarten in love.

Completely obsessed with one another's company.

I remember sitting at his kitchen table and eating smarties.

I remember learning how to draw stars with him.

I remember the days of kissing tag.

What fine days those were.

Then the dreadful news came.

I was moving.

Which meant I was forced to enroll at a new school.

The heartbreak.

The agony.

The sorrow.

Yes, our divine relationship had come to a close.

Lets skip a head a bit.

Elementary passed.

Slowly, but it passed.

Going into Junior High, I had expectations that me and

(his blogging identity shall be)

Crush would be reunited.

It was a little more complicated.

We had different friends.

We didn't see each other much.

I became terrified that the boy didn't remember me anymore.

So I never said anything.

Now high school.

Lets just say, my once little lover 

has turned into quite the young man.

Soccer player.

Piano master.

School scholar.

He is amazing.

And I have fallen back into that infatuation

that consumed me about a decade ago.

But there is still a problem.

I haven't talk to this boy in ten years.

I shake when I think about approaching him.

He makes me nervous.

He still makes me a giddy little piglet.

What do I do?

How do I approach him?

We don't know.

I will find a way.

And I will let you know when I have overcome my fear.

He is amazing.

One day, he will love me again.

Hoorah!